10 Things I'm teaching my kids that I learned the hard way (Part 1)

      PART 1

      You are not pinoy if your mon or dad has not told you, "papunta ka pa lang, pabalik na ako" (Trust me, I've been there, I've done that).  I never really appreciated that sermon until I became a mom myself.   

     

      Here are the  first 5 important things I learned in my growing up journey that I want my kids to know as early as now so that they will not grow up as dysfunctional as their crazy mom :)

1. Don't let the bully win.

      Bullies think it is ok to be mean because you let them or they see that they can scare you.

Stand up for what is right.  Learn to say don’t do that or I’ll punch your face.    And if the guidance counselor calls our moms, my mom will punch your mom’s face.  So it’s either that or we just co-exist peacefully.

Of course it is so easy to say, understand mean kids, they probably have problems at home. Well in the real world, everyone has problems.   Having issues does not give anyone the license to make other people’s lives miserable.

                                           

Do not get me wrong, I do not condone violence but if there is one thing I regret not doing it is standing up to a bully.

2.  Speak up!

  I was once complaining to my sister on how my boss believed in my colleague more only because he spoke louder.  Then she asked me, "Did he speak louder or did you just not speak up?"  She continued by telling me this story:

      In her first job in the U.S. she noticed Filipino workers who have been at their jobs for so long but have never been promoted.  When asked why, they said they never said anything because they were shy or afraid.  So she went up to her boss and demanded for a raise.  When asked why, she said: "Because I  deserve it!" and she got it.

      You can only be heard if you speak up.
9
      (Parang lotto lang yan, di ka mananalo kung di ka tataya)

3.   Do not expect everyone to like you.   

       I am a people pleaser.  So if people do not like me, I always think it is my fault (ano kya ginawa ko bakit bugnot sya).   I grew up in a family who values image—A LOT.  I mean, why is the opinion of other people more important than my own feelings anyway?

At the end of the day, instead of worrying what other people will think, just worry about what God will think.  Instead of trying to please everyone so they will like you, just make sure God is pleased with you.   

4.       Value people not things.

      My husband scratched the car and I got so furious.  My daughter Sasha wrote on my newly purchased sneakers and I went berserk, my baby Sky erased the poker app in my phone and I thought I was going to go crazy.  After all the rage, I realized, what is more important, the sneakers , the car, the phone or my family? Toink talaga…of course it’s the phone! Leader nako sa stats ng poker e.---Joke J 

My greatest treasure will always be my family.

5.       High grades are not as important as enjoying the ride.

                                                                                                                                  

I understand now that what school teaches is not Math, Science or Literature.   It teaches you a sense of responsibility to do what needs to be done to achieve a goal. 

It teaches you to wake up early even when you are still sleepy.  It teaches you to commit to a deadline.  It teaches you to make friends...

All these are what is important in the real world.  Learn to love the journey and the grades will follow.  Even if you are not an achiever, what is important is you are happy and you did your best.

There is no strict rule in parenting.  We all have different kids with different personalities. So it is really what works for you. My girls are not angels but everybody who knows them know I did a good job. If I can raise good kids who will raise better children in the future then I know what I went through is all worth it.  

   

PS: Ok, ok, don't punch the bully! Just let your crazy mom (whose regret in life is not being able to stand up to a bully) do it for you. :)